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121: Learn More about Yourself by Exploring Enneagram Books

Updated: Apr 17, 2020

In this episode, we have a great time discussing what we've each learned about the enneagram. We each chose a book (Ashley chose Millenneagram: The Enneagram Guide for Discovering Your Truest, Baddest Self, Jen chose The Essential Enneagram, and Sara chose The Road Back to You: An Enneagram Journey to Self-Discovery) to read that explored the enneagram, and we did our best to figure out our numbers. It was an adventure, and we had fun sharing with you! Stick around for our board game recs during our Give Me One at the end of the episode.

Bookish Check In

Jen - Maggie Stiefvater’s Call Down the Hawk

Ashley - Helen Hoang’s The Kiss Quotient

Enneagram Books We Each Read

Jen - David Daniels, M.D., and Virginia Price, Ph.D.’s The Essential Enneagram

Sara - Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile's The Road Back to You: An Enneagram Journey to Self-Discovery

Other Mentions

Free Enneagram Test that Ashley took

Paid Enneagram Test that Sara took

Give Me One - Favorite board game to play with your family

Ashley - Simple Farm Bingo (farm animal bingo), 5 Minute Dungeon, Mancala

Sara - Qwixx

Jen - HedBanz

Other Games Mentioned

Interested in what else we're reading? Check out our Featured Books page.


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Want to see a sneak peek of what we discussed in this episode? You can read our discussion below. To see a full transcript and listen at the same time, click here to access it on

Sara 0:02

Hello and welcome to Episode 121. We are going to be discussing the Enneagram today. But before we do that, we just want to remind you to just keep connecting with us on Instagram. Even though there's this time where we can't all connect personally, we can connect on Instagram, and we are really interested in continuing to have conversations about books and reading with you, so just make sure that you are checking us out @unabridgedpod on Instagram and on our Facebook page.

Bookish Check In

Sara 1:02

Before we get started with our discussion today, we are going to just do a bookish check in really quickly. So Jen, do you want to start us out?

Jen's Bookish Check In (1:15)

Sure. I just started Maggie Stiefvater’s Call Down the Hawk. And this is going to be a trilogy. I believe it's called the Dreamers trilogy, and it's a follow up to her four book series, The Raven Cycle, which started with The Raven Boys, and is about this group of friends who attend this exclusive academy and live in this small town. And I don't want to spoil that series, but things happen. And then this is after the fact and so far, it's really interesting. They were all but the academy that they attended was a high school, and now they've reached the age where they're in college. So it's sort of that what happens with your friend group after you leave high school and how do you continue connecting. I'm not very far yet, but it's great so far.

book cover of Maggie Stiefvater's Call Down the Hawk

Sara 2:03

Awesome. Ashley, what are you reading?

Ashley's Bookish Check In (2:05)

So I raved before about Helen Hoang's The Bride Test, which was an unexpected joy for me to read. And I am now going back and reading The Kiss Quotient. So I am really enjoying that. I haven't read very much yet, but I love it. And I said on Instagram, I was reading it and people said, Oh, you should read The Bride Test afterwards. Actually, I went the wrong order. I didn't even realize that we're connected. They're actually only like loosely connected. Is that right? I remember that they were connected, but I think it's like it's kind of like the Kristin Cashore series where there are connections but they're distantly related, like maybe some of the characters overlap or something or like Stephanie Perkins with Anna and the French Kiss. I think it's one that there's some similar characters, but anyway, regardless, apparently I went in the wrong order, but I am very excited to read it and I've really enjoyed it so far.

book cover of Helen Hoang's The Kiss Quotient

Sara 3:00

It's so steamy.

Jen 3:03

I want to go back and just say I should have said Call Down the Hawk is a fantasy series. So even though I was focused on the very real, like moving past high school, there's a lot of fantasy and magic in it as well, just in case anybody's looking to pick it up... you should know that. What are you reading, Sara?

Sara's Bookish Check In (3:18)

Well, I'm having some trouble getting into anything at the moment. But I picked up one that I've had for a while. And I picked up Dear Girls by Ali Wong. And I mean, it is hilarious, but it is raunchy. So I feel like I need that disclaimer, because it I mean, it's her comedy, and it is pretty raunchy. And the book follows suit. So what I'm liking about this book is it's written in letters to her daughters, and she also does make this disclaimer that they can't read it until they are 21. So that kind of tells you about the content, but it's really it's funny, and she just has this matter of fact, no nonsense delivery that I'm really connecting with. And it's also one that I can dip in and out of without... There's not like a common narrative that I have to focus on, which is really good for me at the moment. Yeah. So I am really enjoying it. It's funny, but again, it is definitely raunchy. And, I mean, it's just raunchy. Not even just raunchy. So I'm really enjoying it. And it's given me a laugh. So,

Jen 4:31

book cover of Ali Wong's Dear Girls

And you're listening, right?

Sara 4:33

No, it is off of Scribd. I couldn't find it on Scribd, but I actually had a hard copy of it. So I would have preferred to listen to it because I'm sure she reads it and the delivery is even better, but the hardcopy is working okay, so that's great.

Jen 4:47

Yeah, I did listen to the audio. So if anybody can get a hold of that she does read it herself. And oh, my goodness. Yes. I mean, as a stand up comedian. Yeah, she's got a great delivery, but I'm sure the text is good, too.

Sara 5:02

Well, they both sound great. I have read The Kiss Quotient but not The Bride Test. So that is on my list for hopefully in the near future.

Ashley 5:11

You would love that one, Sara.

Main Discussion - Sharing about Our Enneagram Books

Sara 5:15

So now we are going to start our discussion on the Enneagram. We have discussed this a bit off mic, and we've had some mixed feelings about it. But what we did is we each read a different book on the Enneagram and now we are going to discuss it but I thought before we actually do the discussion, we could each just say the book that we read. So Ashley, what book did you read?

Ashley 5:42

Sure I... we're on video also, so I'm like showing the book and then I thought listeners can't see the book. But it is beautiful. I read Hannah Paasch’s Millenneagram: The Enneagram Guide for Discovering Your Truest, Baddest Self, and it I actually listened on audio initially and I went ahead and got the hardcopy as well. And what I didn't expect about the hardcopy is it is gorgeous. It's just got... it's really colorful and color coded and very has a very nice tactile aspect of it.

Sara 6:18

What did you read?

I read David Daniels and Virginia Price's The Essential Enneagram: The Definitive Personality Test and Self Discovery Guide. And it is not pretty colors.

It does have a lot of diagrams.

Ashley 6:39

For the record, mine does not have a lot of diagrams. In fact, I don't think we have any diagrams on mine. Just a lot of nice colors.

Jen 6:44

Yeah, it is it is much like a textbook. So picture a very short textbook in your head and that's what my book looks like.

Sara 6:53

So, I don't sense any bitterness there.

Jen 6:56

What about you, Sara?

Sara 6:58

Book Cover - The Road Back to You

I read The Road Back to You: An Enneagram Journey to Self-Discovery by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile. And it was it's set up in a really easy to to read manner it talks about the each enneagram type. And there are like top 20 list of things that are related to each enneagram type. So it makes it really easy and easy to kind of digest as you read. There is a faith component to this one. So that's something probably people want to know. And a lot of it has to do... What I liked about this book is it talks about each type it like as a kid in a relationship as a worker. And I thought that was really interesting. So even though it had the faith component, and it did talk about relationships, it talks about it in a general way and I think it's really accessible for anybody. So I really thought it was interesting.

I should say I posted on Instagram yesterday about the enneagram and my problems, we'll get to this, but my problems identifying my enneagram. And I posted the book that I read, and people were like, Oh my gosh, that's the best one. So my judgment is not everyone's judgment. And I will say both of yours in your descriptions seem much more appealing than mine. So...

I felt like with Ashley, you had Jen at color coded!

Ashley 8:21

Book Cover - Millenneagram

I know, right? Well, like I said, I actually didn't realize that because I listened to at first. But another thing that I thought was really unique about mine is that between the different sections, which she studies the types, so she groups them by triads, and goes through it that way. But in between that she she does these kind of snapshots of different different personality types based on their numbers. So for example, in the beginning, it's how each type travels by airplane. And I think it's those are hilarious. The book is hilarious. I should have said that. It's really funny. It is crass. There's a lot so like you said about Ali Wong's, being raunchy. That's something people should know, this one is really crass, which is totally great for me, but maybe not for everyone. And just hilarious. But those little snapshots also are really informative because I think that how we think about how people handle different situations, like being on a, you know, like me on an airplane is a great way to have a sense of which number you might identify best with. And so I felt like it was really helpful in that way as well, because I think that in order for the Enneagram to be useful, you do have to get a sense of preferably a single number that you relate to, but certainly that there are certain numbers that make more sense for you. Because I think if you can identify that for yourself that it's hard to take any of the advice, to be able to apply any advice or find it useful. So, so I appreciate it that, those little snapshots.

Sara 9:45

So before we kind of dive in, more specifically, do each of us want to share our numbers? And we can just also discuss if we've taken multiple tests, and what that entailed and what our results were. Who wants to start?

Jen 10:05

I feel like I should go last. Unload.

Ashley 10:09

Okay, so one thing that I'm sure is indicative of my personality is that I have only done one test. Personality tests are not my thing, but I did one and it was the full the one that is it is the free version, but it is a relatively extensive one, it probably took somewhere around 30 minutes. And so I and that we can link that in our show notes, the one that I used, but it gave me the result of personality type ONE, and with some other possibilities, but that was the dominant one. And since then, I have not taken any other personality tests. But when I when I read this book, I did feel like I identified with a lot of the traits of the one so I believe that I am a 1w2 as my personality type. Other people are welcome to weigh in on that who know me.

Sara 11:05

So since Jen wants to go last, I have done two personality tests. A year ago I did a simple one that was free and I got a NINE. And then so to prepare for this, I decided I was going to do the paid test and I paid $12 and we can also link the one that I took it was 144 questions and it gave me a lot of anxiety to take it because there were... I just didn't know which one I was... I guess that's also indicative of my personality. I was like I don't know which one to choose which one am I, and i just second guessed everything. But I for this one, I got the I got type SIX, the loyalist, and I do think like especially in the times we are currently living in the one of the things that it says is a type six exemplifies the desire to create a stable, safe environment and I am currently in crisis mode because I feel like that is not happening. And you know that that that is not the way. So I mean, I'm really being able, I think having kind of studied this for this episode, it is making me really understand what my personality is like in times of crisis, and how I react and those types of things. So it's been pretty illuminating for me. And then my other, I was really so like, in the test that I took, it gives score. So I was a 27 in the type six, and then I was a 25 in the helper, which is type two, and then I was a 22 in the peacemaker, which is a nine. So the nine was still there. So like, kind of i think that it is probably more accurate, it was just really honing in on each specific thing. And because it was a bigger test, it was able to give me more accurate results. So I feel like it's, this was a pretty close for me.

Ashley 12:58

Jen, I want to hear about Jen. I'm gonna pull up mine to see what those other numbers were.

Jen 13:03

Book cover - The Essential Enneagram

Okay, so I first did an Enneagram test when we did our first and Anne Bogel episode, and I do not remember what I got that time. So I started with a fresh slate. I took the test that Ashley talked about, and that one gave me a 1, 3, 6. And then I got my book and I was like, oh, okay, so my book, The Essential Enneagram, has nine paragraphs describing the types. And you're supposed to read the nine paragraphs and choose the top three that are most like you and then rank them. And then you're supposed to have someone close to you read it as well. So I had my husband read it, and kind of confirm, like, what do they think you are? So my book gave me a 9, 5, 1. So I was like, Huh, that's very different from this online test. So what do I do? I got another test. And that one said, I'm a 4. At this point, I was experiencing some frustration. I may have texted you guys a little. Yeah. And I think part of my issue was I just expected to like dive in, know, my type read through it. Because I think most personality types are designed to put you in a category fairly quickly. And then you're in there, and then you can read about all the things. So I've been all over the map. And I really do think that this all of this probably says something about my personality and something about which enneagram I should be. Yeah, but I don't know what that thing is. In my Instagram post, someone who seemed to know a lot about it said that nines are often the hardest to type. And that was my result from my book. So I'm like, maybe I'm an 9... At this point, I don't know. So I just proceeded reading my book under the assumption that because my book said I'm a nine, that's the section I focused on, and there were certainly things there that seemed reflective of me. There were also some things I went ahead and read it said to read kind of your top three. So I read about the three and about the one as well, since those were my closest from my book, and there were parts of those that seemed like me. Honestly, when I read the nine paragraphs, I think there were only two that I was like, that's definitely not me and all of the rest all the other seven. I was like, oh, maybe that one, maybe that one. So yeah, I'm proceeding with a lot of uncertainty. A little bit of frustration. And I feel normally I love this kind of thing. I like categories. I like sorting I like all these things. So I think part of my frustration was expecting that I would go in and feel this great sense of comfort and identification and learning about myself and instead I've just been wandering through this hallway of Enneagram numbers blindly unsure which door to open because that's my door. So, sorry about that rant. But that's where I am.

Ashley 15:56

Well, I think expectations do have a lot to do with reception of this because I was thinking I would not enjoy this... Again, I've only taken one of the tests. I don't I am not a quiz clicker. I do not have any interest in completing online quizzes. I don't love the BuzzFeed stuff, none of that. But I started this one and just absolutely loved it. I loved the tone. I loved the expression. And I just really enjoyed learning about the way that all the different personality types have things to celebrate, but obviously also ways that they could grow and I think that Paasch does that really well (I should have looked up how to pronounce her last name prior to this, so I apologize for that). But Hannah Paasch, she has. She's very active. She has a blog, she has a podcast. So she you know, I think she just really has a sense of audience and how to be relatable. And I think that really comes through in the book and so it just I was expecting it to be a bit of a write off for me and so I was pleasantly surprised. So yeah, I think expectations make a difference.

Sara 16:58

You know, it's funny, though, we did our Anne Bogel episode on Reading People I feel I mean, I, I felt like you to Ashley at that time, were just kind of like, but then you got really into it when we did the personality testing. And maybe you're just like a closet personality test lover, you just don't know that.

Ashley 17:15

It can be, it could be, because it is really funny to realize that I am interested in it for sure. So I might have some time on my hands to take some personality quizzes folks, so I can keep you posted.

Jen 17:27

I will say, Sara, when you were talking about how reading about how your type reacts in times of crisis, or in times of anxiety, that's something that I find to be really helpful about personality tests. There's one we did as a school a long time ago, 10 years more, that it's called the true colors test. And it puts you in one of four colors. And it's it's pretty simple. Like you can do it really fast. And it's pretty generalized. But what I liked about it was then when I was interacting with colleagues whose colors were different for mine like I'm a blue And when I was interacting with someone who was a green or who was a gold, and they were doing something that I found to be frustrating, I could be like, this person is just gold. And so that is why this person is prioritizing this over, like blue is all about emotions and feelings and making everybody feel comfortable. And I just, it was helpful to see the context of the larger personality. And then to understand that just everybody does not see the world like me. I don't know that, but it is that Oh, I remember that you are an orange. And so the fact that that is my last color means that we are going to have to work to understand each other. And so that's one thing, just that level of understanding, like, Oh, I'm reacting to this situation, because that's how my personality reacts. Not that I am being difficult or inflexible or whatever. I think that's really helpful. That's one reason I like personality tests.

Sara 18:56

It's really funny when when I was reading this, as everyone knows Ashley, Jen and I went to a podcast conference not too long ago. And when we were reading it, because we were joking while we were at the podcast conference that Jen and I were Ashley's like backup dancers would go up and ask question to like vendors and things like that. And Jen and I would stand kind of in the back in there, and then people would think we were in line and we were like, no, we're just with, around Ashley.I feel like that's really indicative of our personality.

Ashley 19:30

I felt like you all wanted a sign that said, Please don't talk to me. We're good. We're good. Please don't talk to us.

Sara 19:39

So I do want to say before we move on to something else, the test that I took the $12 one, like it, I we do have video, audio. We have video with our audio today. So, I'm showing Jen and Ashley... I mean, it gave me this printout of my my types, my top three types. And like I said, mine were all really close together. So I mean, it does give you a lot of information if you do decide to take it. And we're not getting any kickbacks or anything from it, but I just, I can tell the difference in the $12 tests that I took and the free test. So that's something, I guess.

Ashley 20:18

Yeah. And I think like Jen was saying, I do appreciate the instructive nature of it. Because I think if you can get a sense of which personalities you are, and how they interact with the personalities of the people you love, I think that can be really valuable. And I felt like that was to me that the Millenneagram book did really well is just saying that like each... within the chapters about each number it gets into how to relate to like for other people how to for me, how to relate to a personality type one, when you're not a one, and then how to better relate to other people when you are one and like something that really resonated for me. Like she talks about for ones, there's always a desire to reform and to make change, and you see the problems and everything and so you're always trying to make changes. And I definitely, as Jen and Sara know all too well, suffer from that phenomenon and always wanting to make things better. And regardless of how good they are, I guess and you know, one of the things that she says is, "I know it seems stupid not to correct what to you is an obvious problem. The problems are many and they are everywhere, in your workplace, in your family, in your home, and in yourself. The huge growth edge for you will be to realize that just because something is best for you, that doesn't mean it's best for someone else. Wild. I know. If the problem you find is one that's in yourself, the best way to fix it is not by shaming yourself for having it the only thing shame does is exacerbate a soul problem, like squeezing lemon juice into an open wound." Yeah, so and it goes on from there, but it gets a little more profane. But I mean, I think I think that a lot of that just really resonated for me because for sure relating to other people is not always my strength. As would be natural if changing things and correcting problems is a big part of my personality type. And sometimes it's hard for me to be open and emotive and accepting of the way things are. And I think within relationships and within life, and certainly the situation that we're all living through right now, trying to accept the way things are, is very important. And so it has been really instructive for me to kind of think about how can I be a better mom a better partner, a better friend, without being judgmental of myself or other people. So you know, I appreciate that.

Sara 22:36

So, in my book, he has this quote near the beginning that says, "What is getting out of your own way entail?" and I do feel like the enneagram helps us figure out how to get out of our own way and how to think through our limitations in our personality that off and I do feel like that was one of the big takeaways that I found about myself is that I definitely get in my own way a whole lot. And I mean, I really even think when I think through like having the podcast and being, you know, like not wanting like feeling really anxious about going up and talking to people like at at pod fest when we were there, and trying to think through ways that I can get out of my own way and, you know, put myself out there more so... But knowing that my instinct is to do all these things that sixes do, then trying to push past that and, you know, do what other what some of the other types do and such in social situations, and in times of crisis, I do think that it is illuminating to be able to know that about yourself and try to figure out ways in start coping and strategies that you that can help you, you know, get out of your own way. So I hope that you take away from me from my book. Did you all have any big takeaways from your... from either your book or just like thinking through what the enneagram means and what you've learned from it?

Jen 24:09

Yeah, so my book had these great sections where it talked about connected types. And then most non connected types, probability of type. So it was like, if you chose, they call nine the mediator. So if you chose the mediator nine, there's a 68% probability that that is the right type, but there's a 7% probability that it might be a one, a 6% probability, that might be a two. So just that acknowledgement that it's not an exact science. And then it has myths about the type, adjectives describing the type, and then it sort of goes through and talks about what you put your energy into, what you do everything to avoid, for me conflict, confrontation, feeling uncomfortable, and those are definitely all true. And then at the end, there's a section where it's practices for the mediator and Ashley, this reminded me of what you were talking about, like things ways you can grow. It had practice receptive awareness taking action, reflecting to reclaim your higher qualities. So it's a pay particular attention to how much your attention and energy are pulled by, and then dispersed into the many claims made upon you leading to indecisiveness and over accommodation. Stop several times a day for a minute or so to reflect by breathing down and in allowing yourself to become aware and receptive. And I found that to be really helpful, because I do think sometimes, I want to make all the things work for all the people. And that's not always great, because then no place gets enough of my attention or all of my attention that they need. So yeah, so I did find... again, I'm still not sure I am a nine, but even I think it's probably one of my higher number. So even with that, there were things that I thought oh, yeah, if I were more conscious of this, if I were more reflective, that would be helpful to me.

Sara 25:54

That makes sense. How about you, Ashley?

Ashley 25:56

Yeah, I mean, I think that like I said before, one of the things that are really appreciated about Hannah Paasch's book was just this focus on accepting your own personality type and personality types of others, and using that as a way to find fulfillment in your life and to, you know, to just enjoy where you are, instead of always trying to be somewhere else kind of and so she just does to all the there's kind of a conclusion part that's a "Millenneagram Huddle," and she just emphasizes "you don't need to be perfect" and talks about that. "You don't need to be nicer" and talks about that and "you don't need to be harder" and talks about that. And I think that those are really great takeaways, because again, I think that within the different triads and the way that those different groups function, all of us can benefit from some of those things of just thinking about you know, you don't have to no one is perfect. I think that's part of what it does well, too, is that when you think about the pros and cons of each personality type of course, there are some pros and some cons to each and so just thinking about that, and her big emphasis is on using the enneagram as an instrument of self healing. And so she's just talking a lot about using this as a way to better understand yourself, better understand the people around you, and again, just be enjoy a happier life from thinking about those things. And another thing I like is like in the book, she talks a lot about which direction which the personality types you move toward in crisis and the personality types you move toward, in growth, like in a moment of fulfillment, and that while it is great to be able to move toward the integration, like positive integration, so she talks about its integration and disintegration. (I'm kind of getting in the weeds here. So I need to wrap this up.) But basically, like I appreciate it, that also because it was kind of saying all of our personalities are fluid. They change based on everything around us, of course, and as they change, they can change in good ways or in bad ways. And even if they're moving in the disintegration way, because you're crisis, it doesn't mean that that's not a moment of learning about yourself and being able to pivot and look in a different direction and make a change. And so I really appreciated that too. I mean, again, with the turmoil in our world right now, I think all of us are having to think about how we navigate the world that we're in right now. And instead of focusing on the negative, just being able to say, okay, maybe these things I'm turning in the wrong direction, and can I look in a different way instead, I really appreciate it all of that.

Sara 28:30

I have to say, Ashley, I'm very intrigued by your book, and I kind of want a copy for myself. I think it sounds really great.

Ashley 28:38

I will definitely be... so my partner had recommended this and he loves a lot of her other work. He like he follows her on Twitter and just really liked her as a personality. And so I didn't know anything about her before but like I said, I loved her voice. I loved her attitude. And I thought that I learned a lot about the book but I also just enjoyed reading it and And so, yeah, I think I mean, I thought it was great. I mean, I went ahead and ordered a copy after because I knew that I would want to reference it. And then when I got it, and it was gorgeous and color coded, and that was all the better. Very, very inviting to the reader.

Sara 29:15

That's awesome. Well, does anyone have any thing that they want to say about the enneagram that we haven't discussed? I feel like we touched on a lot of things. And we'll put resources in the show notes that we used and the links and all that will be there. But Ashley, go, Jen, do you have any final comments?

I'll just say despite my frustration with finding my enneagram (I feel like I should pause there), I do think it's useful to explore personalities. And I think even I mean, recognizing how frustrated I was, is reflection in and of itself. And so I think that kind of reflection is always productive, and realizing that it's okay to power through and learn what you can about them. result that you've gotten and knowing that there are potentially other results out there that that's all okay. So I came to a decent place about it, even though that may not have sounded that way through the episode. But yeah, I still do think personality tests and and thinking about yourself in that way is useful and worthwhile.

Ashley 30:17

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And just to add to that, I think that as we are potentially all spending a lot more time at home, and potentially in, you know, small quarters with the people in our, you know, with our family or with whoever we live with. I think it is a great time to do a little gentle and accepting study of ourselves and what we can do to try to navigate these waters because I think it's totally natural to be having a hard time and to get focused on the negative parts. But I do feel like I mean, I have been spending a lot more time thinking, you know, pausing at the end of the day to think about the things that I'm really glad that we did during the day and to be grateful for things because I just think that It's important Yeah, we've just got to keep ourselves up. I think that thinking about, like I said, I just learned a lot about and was reminded about the limitations of my own personality and how I can be gracious about those and accept that in myself, but also make some efforts to soften that when it is abrasive to other people, or, you know, that kind of thing. And so I think if I felt like that was all really helpful,

Sara 31:24

I think there's power in knowing what you are, but also what you're not and where, where you can go and how you can interact with others. I am thinking through I want to get the book Ashley was talking about and I also want my husband while we're navigating these new waters in our world, I would like him to take it so I feel like that could be really illuminating. For me, especially what if we're going to be spending more time at home It will be nice to know those things.

Ashley 31:53

Yeah. And that's what I... my husband also hasn't taken it, but I'm pretty sure that he I'm pretty sure I know his number from based on the book, it seemed like I think he's probably a five. And I'm not positive, do you want him to take the quiz, but it was helpful because that section and we're talking about how to, you know better help people you love who revive those tips are really helpful for me. So and same with the one I mean, in the one section, it was just kind of saying, if you have a loved one who's at one, the most important thing to do is to say you are enough, and I accept you the way that you are. And I think that is something I do need to hear. But I think also that I don't present that way to other people. And so I can see how that is that's useful for somebody to know about me, because I don't think that it necessarily comes across in my our personality. And so, you know, I think that that's something that enneagram does. Well, is that kind of hidden part.

Give Me One - Favorite Game to Play with Family

Sara 32:45

Well, I think that was a great discussion on the Enneagram. Even if we didn't all have the same experience, I think that was a fruitful discussion. We're going to go ahead and move on to our Give me one section and our topic today is favorite board games to play with your family. Since some of us might be spending more time inside, we thought we would give some of our family favorites. Jen, do you want to start us off?

Jen's Give Me One (33:12)

Sure. So I am recommending today Headbanz. And if you have not played, when you open the game, there is a literal plastic headband. And you put that on your head, and it has a little slot on your forehead, and you're supposed to put cards facing out. And the cards have different objects and animals and things on them. And so the people you're playing with are trying to get you to guess what that is. So you're asking questions to try to narrow it down. It's kind of like 20 questions in a way. And it can be, it can be great. I think for kids. If you want to think about educational elements, it's great at critical thinking and figuring out what questions you need to ask to narrow something down. We do a lot of 20 questions in my house. Usually about you Animals. So we are practicing that all the time. That's a daily dinner, daily dinner game. And yeah, so it's really fun. It's also just really goofy because you're sitting there with a headband on. And you're constantly putting these new cards in, and they're really silly. So it can be a lot of fun. But I do think it has some good thinking components, which I'm looking at things that are balancing those right now, because we may have a long haul in front of us.

Sara 34:25

Ashley, how about you?

Ashley's Give Me One (34:27)

So my kids are three and five. So we're still in the it is very challenging to play games era. But I will say that I have a few recommendations. So one that is always a favorite is Bingo. And we have just a little farmyard animals bingo game that only requires three across and so that is great. And in fact, my three year old was desperately trying to get me to play with her on it as I was stepping out this morning to record, and so that's just a great one because we can't go wrong with it. What my kids really like to do, And again, I think this is a fun thing for younger kids to do, is set up their stuffed animals to play as well. And so like there are four, you know, game cards, so they would have all the game cards out and then they spin not just for themselves, but also for their animal friends. And so that's an imaginative component that kind of stretches out the game a bit. So that's been a great one.

My older daughter who's five is really enjoying Mancala, that is a really nice two person or team game that has the stones that you move back and forth. And there's definitely some strategy involved. But it's a simple concept. So I think it's a good one for kids as young as five because they are able to strategize. There's, you know, ways to think about how many stones are in the in each spot in order to maximize your moves and stuff like that. So it's really nice because there's some great strategy involved but then it's also very simple to play. So that's a good one.

And then finally one that we have that my kids are a little bit young for that I think is a great team game. It's called a Five Minute Dungeon. And that one is a little bit Dungeons and Dragons like, but very simple. So you're working as a team to defeat a boss. It's a card game. Everybody has different cards, and they're figuring out how to best play their cards as a team in order to complete the tasks on the main card. And so that's one, that one's been really great for us because the navigating of who wins and who loses and all that stuff is maybe always difficult, but definitely is very difficult with little kids and my five year old is very much ready to play games, but my three year old is still young for them. And to that team games are great because she can participate or not, but she's at the table. She's got cards and she's happy being with us doing it and not feeling like she has to have a turn and that kind of thing. So that's been a really good activity.

Sara 36:54

Oh, that's awesome.

Ashley 36:55

What about you, Sara?

Sara's Give Me One (36:56)

So right now, our favorite game Quixx, which is a dice game, a dice game with and it has like a pad of paper with it, it's super quick. Each game only takes like 15 minutes. And you can have as many players as you want, but you can have as few. And that's nice because my husband also loves to play it. And he actually is always asking my daughter to play it with him because he really enjoys it. And they just really love to play it together. And then I can cook dinner while they are playing dice the dice game, and it has some strategy to it. And again, it's just, it's, I mean, you roll a handful of dice and there are strategies to like you're marking off numbers and you're trying to get the most numbers marked off and it has some math, a math component to it. So it's a really fun one. And it's super, like I said super quick. And because I'm one of the people that I hate like playing Monopoly because it takes like two hours or three hours. I'm always Like please any game but that. So I like ones that are about half an hour. That's my attention span for

I'm like that with TV shows and with games. 20 minutes or less. I did wonder Sara with that one, how young do you think kids can play it?

Sara 38:18

So so my daughter is eight and she is able to play it with no problems. We did have some a couple of gray areas with rules. But we after the first couple times that we played, we got that all settled. And so I think anywhere from I would say seven and not just because there's some there's some math, there's like a little bit of a math and then there's also like strategy involved. So younger kids might not understand the strategy, but it definitely takes like one or you know, one to three games to actually get all the strategy components in your head and but then it gets really easy and then the games become really quick and that's what we like about it.

Ashley 38:59

Nice. All right. Realize that I cheated with Give me one and gave people more than one didn't give me. I think it's because I felt that the one that I most often play, which is bingo is maybe not everyone's thing, they're going to be desperate to you that's not going to be a new discovery for anyone. So that's the honest truth, but maybe not when that all of you are gonna rush to go play.

Sara 39:24

Well, I will say to for little kids, my kids loved spotted and that was another quick, quick game. That's a really good one, too.

Ashley 39:31

We have that one. And it is nice. And again, a lot of variations. So I think that's another good one to have some imaginative play or just have different ways to play, which is nice.

Jen 39:39

Have you all played in Uno Moo? No, I will have to show you that. So that is, it's like, you know, but you have a little barn and it has these cute little round characters like a cow and a skunk. And so you're trying to match either the type of animal or I think there's a wild card anyway. So it's like getting kids ready to play, you know, but it's really cute. So it's appealing.

Sara 39:58

That sounds awesome. Okay, well, we want to thank you today for listening. We hope that you enjoyed this discussion on the enneagram. And we also hope that you got some ideas for games you can play with your kiddos while we are all spending more time at home. And we just ask that you continue to connect with us on Instagram and Facebook and discuss our book club books and our buddy reads and we hope to see you there or talk to you there really soon. Thank you for listening.


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